Scribbled Thoughts

Forever can spare

a minute

to look back

and reflect

and regret

and hope

things could be different.

Forever can spare

an hour

to remember

and reconstruct,

to rewrite

and fantasize.

Forever can spare it;

that’s what forever is.

Drip down

and create sticky paths

to trap shoes

and wrench them

from feet.

Claim the prize

of captured soles

forever empty

with no occupant.

But don’t they make

a beautiful collage

to marvel at,

as they block your path?

They call a trap

and I guess I am,

trapped in this body

that isn’t really mine.

I love the fingers,

the toes, the head,

but parts feel wrong

they don’t belong

and I wish to cut, slash

remove everything

until I am real, whole.

I have a box of forbidden items,

ones I wear to become whole.

The weight of fake breasts

steadies my breathing,

the flowing flow of light fabric

lifts my mouth into a smile.

Make-up softens my skin

and a wig highlights my personality.

I cannot change my voice

but extravagant necklaces mask

my masculine apple.

People see me, the real me,

are pleasant and friendly

until they hear me talk

and call me a trap.

I don’t want to be a trap,

I just want to be myself.

Paladin to a demon,

a noble class corrupted,

with the power seeped through

from a being with no soul.

Dreams of grandeur

die on the blade

that can only be summoned

with death’s intent.

Let it fall and die a fool?

Or live and become

the most feared creature

to plague our nightmares.

He is confident, resilient,

he will say he’s right

and believe it

even when he’s wrong.

She’s not confident

but still resilient

in a silent way.

She will speak

with a slight mocking undertone

to the one who is wrong.

Both have doubts, anxieties,

both need pushing to achieve

what they want.

I love them both very much.

Prompt: Compare and contrast personality

Control the weather

and ride the clouds,

enter a land of myths

that seem unreal as they stare

and judge you.

Overcome hardships

to rescue a loved one,

and see them gain your reward

because they were born

with what you were not.

Return to normal life

and forget.

But you can never forget.

You can only grow bitter.

Unzip your guts

and reach for the courage

you need,

a defining feature

for people to admire,

to make you excel

beyond the predicted,

and be remembered

as something.

A fell omen

already an onimous presence,

whisper, warning

but then he fell from prediction,

fell from normal imagination

and opened horrors we did not want,

were not ready for,

are forced to now endure,

but cannot overcome.

The sinking feeling

of settling horror

when an absence is noted

and no recollection of its presence

can be remembered.

You claimed it was a favoured item,

but it took you this long

to realise it was missing.

Perhaps, gone forever.

Frantic searching,

frantic phone call…

and then you spot it,

discarded on the floor,

and you swear never to be

so careless again.

Let’s see how long that lasts.

Sneak past in shadows

and remain invisible,

unwanted,

so that even the other

side of yourself

wishes you’d

disappear forever.

(Sorry this is late today, got distracted with the Gollum game, which has also inspired the poem).