Scribbled Thoughts

Test time again

but how to

play the game

with no pressure?

How to hope,

but only a little,

so the familiar disappointment

won’t be too crushing.

Is it time to stop

the chase

altogether?

Rely on

my forgiveness

and know

I won’t take it back.

You may doubt

yourself,

and your worth,

but I don’t.

Let me stand

by your side

and watch you

understand the truth.

Plan a comfort

you need to hide

from judging eyes.

You haven’t moved on?

Still reassured

by repetition

but they see you

as stuck

and refusing

to try.

Inject sugar

to walk their

energy away

while yours

left

hours ago

and restless naps

only

sap it more.

Calculate your time

and value it

by others’ status

of rest.

Work through relaxation

and earn more.

Seems fair.

Wake to

a forgotten task

meant to refresh

but feels

like another weight added.

Repeated routine

will help,

familiar and easy,

until you can face

what’s to come.

Greet me

with a pile of filth

waiting to be ignored

or exhumed.

What option

can my

conscience

live with?

Dangle a hope

for peace

then lock it

away

behind profit

beyond you.

Why would you

expect

anything different?

Sleep away nature

and watch

your body

turn backwards,

not understanding

if it’s active

or seeking dormancy.

What option

gives more hope?

Resonate

with my soul

of fifteen years ago,

remembering

those times

when concepts

and words

ignited my heart

and explained

what living really is.