Scribbled Thoughts

Remember an idol

that drove you

on your path

with an image

not real,

but created

a better role model

for those

who now look up

to you.

They restricted you

for too long

and you operated

on will alone,

now you can flesh out,

build muscle,

show them the

strength laid beneath,

ready to be shown.

Detach my limbs

that have no feeling,

dead long ago

with my innocence

and trust.

Do the new ones

fit better?

Do I have a choice?

Make the decision

to trust again,

dispersing an anger

that kept you alive

but not living,

it’s time to embrace

the happy.

Smile

through the nerves,

tense energy

twitching into joy

as you survive

and proove your worth.

Pile on expectations

but I will

let them

slide away,

because I have

seen my self-worth

and am confident enough

to tell you

no.

Catch up to

oblivion

and regain composure

for when

colours flood in

again,

trying to overwhelm

and yet

still demanding you

power through.

Friendships dropped

through misunderstanding,

whispered poisons

spread throughout the year.

Can it be cleansed

at the source one day?

Is it too late

to try?

Flare up

of past hurt

cripples your day,

but you know

it will pass

and you’ll still be

in the present

where you have

rebuilt yourself.

I have time,

I’ll live long after

you have died

and faded to dust,

but you will

never leave

my heart.