Scribbled Thoughts

Imagine a moment

we never reached,

a touch

never felt

except with

desperate longing,

hard enough

for growing frustration

to cloud the love

that originally

caused it.

Protect their hope

by hiding your own,

disgusting desires

and longing

with rejection.

Can you keep up

the facade?

Witness my scars

and see the beautiful,

the goodness

and the constant

attempts of better.

Does it inspire you too?

Seeker of redemption

to taste the freedom

away from guilt,

away from self-hatred,

will you realise then

the friendships around you

are real?

See my broken

and understand

how strong I’ve been

to live through this

and find a real

happiness

I didn’t find when

whole.

Dance through

my childhood

with words repeated

so often they lost meaning.

Now older ears listen

and cry,

understanding

for the first time

why they had

touched your soul

and left you

sat alone.

Remember a moment

you decided to change

and forged a new life,

forgetting loneliness

and allowing love

to touch you,

even if it

wasn’t to last.

Redefine your fate

away from idle

self-loathing

into an action

you can stand by.

Begin to

respect yourself

a little.

Eyes on hats,

sleeves

and buttons

for the sin

of always watching

but never reacting.

Will they ever disappear?

Do you want them to?

Redemption

has freed you

into loneliness

so past wounds

are longed for

during the time

you had pain

and purpose.