Scribbled Thoughts

Catch up to

oblivion

and regain composure

for when

colours flood in

again,

trying to overwhelm

and yet

still demanding you

power through.

Friendships dropped

through misunderstanding,

whispered poisons

spread throughout the year.

Can it be cleansed

at the source one day?

Is it too late

to try?

Flare up

of past hurt

cripples your day,

but you know

it will pass

and you’ll still be

in the present

where you have

rebuilt yourself.

I have time,

I’ll live long after

you have died

and faded to dust,

but you will

never leave

my heart.

Slander my name

I’ll still rise again,

dancing my truth

for any who’ll watch.

Those that turn away

are welcome to leave,

I’ll still be here

for the ones who matter

to me.

See my insecurities

and teach me

I am still strong.

Hear my performance

of desperation

and let me escape

into a future formed

from cut strings.

You built me

when I was too young

to choose the parts,

structured my personality

to bend and obey.

But he found me

when I broke

and let me build myself

back up again

into a stronger person,

one who can

finally

stand up to you.

Listen to their excuses

and the whispers

that spin

the blame back to you,

instead of thank you

they’ll accuse,

covering themselves

while you sit

in the aftermath

of betrayal.

Back to that moment

one year ago,

will it be the same?

Or will that brief happiness

and tragedy

be denied you?

Which would

be worse?

Survive the trial

and cope with the wounds

left behind,

trying to perform

the tasks that define you

through the pain

of pushing

too far.