Scribbled Thoughts

Calculate a holiday

and schedule your time,

hoping enough energy

will remain

to enjoy and embrace

what the season

should be celebrating.

Promise of security

dangled to spark overexertion,

using all reserves

for the enticement

of a lazy moment

void of worry,

of nagging,

of the voices

telling you

you are not enough.

Greet strangers with aggression

and watch your circle shrink,

clinging tightly to those remaining

who are trapped

with you

in a glass dome,

waiting to suffocate.

Travel the windy maze

to reach childhood comfort

now sprinkled with responsibility

that aches the nostalgia

and separates the freedom

of joy and desperation.

Would you step back forever,

if you could?

Return of a problem

at the worse moment

to cough up fear

and activate nervous flight

of the mind,

never settling,

only dreading.

Leave it unlocked

to tempt fate,

a life too comfortable

and safe

needs some danger

in the mix,

otherwise are you really alive

when you wake up

everyday happy?

Prepare for the stress

by trying to relax

but having thoughts keep

pressing,

pressing

until only guilt

and anxiety

and dread remain

for tomorrow.

Waiting for items

with longing and struggle,

praying they return soon

so you can stop recycling

what remains.

Realising they already returned,

but behind a locked door

opened by another,

a bittersweet reunion

that still contains relief.

Evidence of labour

coats the skin,

protection or invasion

it’s hard to tell at times.

Scrub the layer off

and feel fresh,

raw to all insistents

and exposed

to understand

truths and intentions

aren’t always right.