Scribbled Thoughts

Angry words

jolt you from standby,

mind now alert

for threats you don’t understand,

yet guilt and indignation

rise to respond

before a reply

is even uttered.

Slip into memories

mixed as yours

and felt by many,

letting you experience

what true loss is

and how there’s always something

that can completely

change your resolve.

Eat away my self

and fill the gaps

with a suitable lie,

weaving a creation

that has no personality

except the remnants of yours

you wish to preserve.

That’s all that’s important now.

Choose your victims’ order

so the weaker watches

their protector fall

and leaves them alone,

their only option

to self-destruct

and hope they

take you with them.

Recur my life in a nightmare

and shock those around

at its truth.

Erase feelings

to stave off concern

but crumble as the past

returns,

forcing me to admit

I am not okay.

Expose your insecurities

by attacking another,

accuse of deception

to hide your own doubt

of who you are

and whether you’ve been

lying all along.

Fear is your only friend now.

Cut away the old and frayed,

split with experience

but condemned as weak,

infecting the healthy, strong and new

who have already arrived

to replace your wisdom.

Small young life

cold and gone,

leaving a shell

no one wants to acknowledge

due to the possibilities it presents

for our own demise.

Already we experienced more

and were not safe

from the fate you found.

It will end,

and people will pass by

and forget.

Wake to time

that seems vast,

full of potential,

but complete familiar movements

and watch it disappear,

just the way it usually does

when you rush

and struggle to fit all in.

Which way is better

in the end?

Good intentions causing harm,

undermining a chance

and sidelining potential growth,

yet the sincere wish to help

makes you smile

and express thanks

while you sink back

into the shadows.