Scribbled Thoughts

20:20

Never have I been so

loved in my life,

never have I felt

so alone. Empty

air occupied around

me, filling the space

with loneliness and

self-pity. Yet I am

the lucky one, with

free time to feel

this absence. No

drive, no purpose,

just the same days,

the same emptiness,

the same me.

But where are you?

---

20:21

A metaphor is a

sarcastic sentence,

there to goad and

sneer at plain

structures with

no extra flare.

Life is exciting?

No! Life is a

rollercoaster.

Heavy rain doesn’t

compare to raining

cats and dogs.

Her heart of gold is

purer than her kind heart.

Be dramatic!

Be remembered!

Be sarcastic.

---

20:22

Common sense banging

at the glass around

your mind.

---

20:23

Time of contempt,

no way out with

a moral high ground.

20:19

Secret mission,

excitement and anxiety,

anticipation and dread,

longing for it to be over,

done, so you can

breathe the sweet air

of freedom again.

Will the outcome make

you light, and turn

towards the future?

Or will it weigh you

down, trapping you in

the moment forever?

Expectation more exciting

than the reveal,

wonder deflates at

the true sighting,

a confused, betrayed

frown resting onto

your features.

One day, perhaps,

you’ll imagine a

more realistic result.

One day, perhaps,

you will smile

again.

20:15

Procrastinate against

yourself, distracted with

different hobbies from

what your soul needs.

Can you even recognise

the beat of your

own heart? Buried

beneath the

mundane of

everyday life.

---

20:16

Fantasy of murder

to gain some

peace and quiet.

How would I do it?

A staged accident,

an impersonal poison

a long-distance weapon,

or an up-close stabbing.

After each disturbed sleep

the fantasy grows more

personal. Each time I

imagine, the guilt is

less and less.

20:13

This is the first day

of your life.

This is your home,

car and money.

This is your loved ones,

enemies, dreams.

Here is your job, hope

and ambition.

Look at how lucky

you are, and

remember that.

This is the first day

of your life, no time

to dwell on what

you don’t have.

Enjoy what you do.

---

20:14

A loss so huge

your colourful world

is reduced to

black and white.

No amount of time

will heal it, only,

perhaps, a return

to a soft grey.

20:11

Heirloom of life

draining power,

a legacy of sacrifice

and redemption.

Feel your line

end forever, but

save the future

of those who

will forget you.

---

20:12

Melted bones sink

into a puddle of

content, bubbles of

happiness popping on

the surface, filling the

atmosphere with life,

and love.

20:10

Conveniently selected

charity, executed at

the moment people

can see and coo at

your generosity. The

receiver has no choice

but to smile and be

grateful, knowing next

time, when no one is

near, nothing will be

offered, but others

will assume help was

given…so why are

they still so bitter?

Be happy,

be grateful.

(These ones are inspired by Final Fantasy VII)

20:8

Years of poison

confusing my mind

and personality.

Toxic overload

muddling my

existence, hero

worship becoming

my reality.

Who was I?

Who are you?

Strike a pose

and play it cool.

This is my life now.

---

20:9

Pot of greed,

your one existence

to demand they

bathe you in

luxury and bliss.

Then, you will

happily be killed,

knowing that for

a few moments

you had enjoyed

their hard-earned

items instead of

them. Was it

worth it?