Scribbled Thoughts

Dangle the motivation

and snatch it away

after you’ve used them

how you wanted,

laughing that they’re

still desperate enough

to jump for the next one

over and over.

Melt with oppressive air

and watch others

bask in a puddle,

becoming one constant noise

and leaving you

with frustration.

Hold in the pressure

and continue as normal,

hoping it dissolves

instead of exploding

and exposing

the mess of you.

Day of peace

interrupted

by the news

we’ve been waiting for

to make life

a little more secure.

Now to begin

the routine again

and see if

it’s really true.

Flashes of living blue

dance amongst the green,

reminding your world

birth is possible

and creation doesn’t end

with your first attempt,

no matter how heavy

your heart is.

Manage the calm

and let your mind relax,

a fortnight of hectic over

so you can melt

into the next stage

and see what new challenges

to expect.

Resist the urge

to fill the gaps

and fail everytime,

too concerned

with disappointment

to draw people’s eyes

to the empty.

Burying your actions

with years of denial,

playing the victim

but stewing

on real hurt,

confusion

and delusion

that you deserve the sympathy

while the dead

stay dead.

Stinging eyes

longing to close

and forget the world,

the demand,

of responsibility,

especially when

they have been denied

the greatest one of all.

Slip into the night

to try rekindle

an old joy

and feeling of ambition.

But I cannot follow,

stuck in the dawn

where I was at peace

but lonely,

so lonely

as I feel you slipping away.